Moving On
Something of an odd title perhaps. One would have to shift over to the blog I created to document our (Becky and me) struggle with her cancer to discover the springboard for this posting. (CancerOne CouplesStory) The short, but not sweet, bottom line is that my beloved Becky lost her battle with cancer. Even though she passed in her sleep the loss still hurts to this day and likely will for a very long time to come.
Living in Dallas was never something I enjoyed in my core. Sure it's nice to be able to run out at 3AM and find a place open to get something to eat.... but that's not the essence of life. Life is for *living* and enjoying. Becky and I (mostly me for the last two years) worked hard to build our retirement home. During that time frame.... and actually the 4 years prior..... I can't recall a time when I didn't have half a dozen projects going at once and Becky busy planning something else to add to my list.
Eventually her last two months and my previous 6 years simply wiped me out. Clinical fatigue left me so physically worn down that just walking from my car into the store where I worked required me to sit down and rest. All my muscles burned as though I had been a the gym pumping iron to failure. I was forced to take a leave of absence from work to rest and recover.
Within the first week without Becky I realized that I simply could not stay in that house without her. It was OUR house... not mine. Since my world had been turned upside-down when she died I decided that as long as I was going through a huge life change anyway..... just floorboard it and get all the life changes over with at once.
As it happens on rare occasions...... God touches your life and things you had only dreamed of for decades suddenly become tangible. My best friend, whom I had known since she was 16 (now 54), also had a life changing event when her husband departed. Since we had always loved each other from afar we decided to get together and see if there was still magic when we were together. To boil all that down into a really short story...... there was and we are. :-)
Of course she and I becoming an US also meant that I had to get my butt busy and start getting the house in Dallas emptied out and things moved up to Wichita Falls. I bought a cargo trailer to make things easier since I had my Isuzu Trooper which could tow it. Sorta. Turns out that the Trooper was just not up to that task so I had to make some *more* changes. Sold the Trooper the next day to a co-worker who really needed it...... then traded Becky's KIA in on a 2002 Ford Excursion with a 7.3 liter diesel engine. I got a good deal in that I only paid $6500 for the truck and blue-book value was just shy of $13K.
However...... two high pressure oil lines had to be replaced. Made the mistake of taking it to the local Ford dealer where I shelled out $1600. I found out later that a local diesel mechanic would have done it for less than $200. Lesson learned.
The big diesel tows the loaded trailer as if it were not even hooked up. Set the cruise control at whatever speed you legally desire and just sit back and enjoy the ride... your butt cradled in leather and the XM radio filling the interior with Bach and Mendelssohn. (Yeah... life is rough)
Several trips back and forth later I arrived in Dallas for another load after having smelled diesel fuel the entire trip. Parked the truck and popped the hood to discover diesel fuel covering the entire passengers side of the engine compartment. The radiator overflow tank was totally full of diesel fuel!! As you might suspect.... that's NOT where it belongs. A quick check on the Internet showed that the injector sleeves were the problem.
Another Internet check showed that dealers charged $3500 per bank to replace the sleeves so double that and we hit $7000 real fast. Remember I only paid $6500 for the truck. Next factor in fact that all the rubber hoses which had come in contact with the diesel fuel would have to be replaced. Otherwise they would soften and potentially fail at the worst possible time. Next drain and flush and refill the cooling system and we're well past $10K at a dealership.
Thus I, once again, hit the Internet and bought the entire sleeve replacement kit.... including the removal and installation tools for a whopping $344. Next I did some shopping around and found a certified shop with a good reputation and got an estimate. Liking what I had heard I delivered the vehicle that afternoon so they could get started. The parts arrived the next morning so my little rental car and I made a quick trip to the shop for the parts delivery.
A rocket trip to Dallas to check on the remaining pets and bring a few odds and ends back then wait for the phone call letting me know that my truck was ready. That call came in early Friday morning so I blasted over to Enterprise to both turn in the rental and to get a ride to the shop. The bill at the non-Ford repair shop was right at $2500 including tax so I was a happy camper. My first round trip to Dallas and back.... driving unloaded down and pulling a trailer full of stationary power tools back indicated an average increase of nearly 4 MPG. With diesel near or over $4 a gallon.... that is significant!
While this transitional period is somewhat stressful we're all gradually making the adaptation towards being a family. The biggest single problem is an obvious one. A person cannot move from one place into another without there being a time frame where things are a bit cluttered. She isn't someone who tolerates clutter well so this period is particularly stressful for her. On the other hand she is happier than she has been in years so there is something of a balance here. I'm still debating the subject of work and not really sure if the Wal-Mart relationship is going to continue or not. Once the house in Dallas sells I honestly have less than $1000 in financial obligations (truck payment for 2 years...... insurance..... investments and phone) and a bit over $2500 a month in income. Donate the excess to my honey up here to help out with expenses and it's all good.
Now that things are settling into a state closer to "normal" once again I plan to be posting on a more regular basis. I have missed this outlet and the opportunity it gives me to both communicate life events here..... and nail the lefts ass to the freaking wall on my more politically orientated blog. (MoveonDOTblog) Oh... in that paragraph just above this one.... exactly at the word "cluttered" the HP wireless keyboard I had been using can to the end of it's usefulness and was broken across my knee and deposited in the nearest trash container. It's performance was.... shall we say..... less than expected or required. Damn..... now if I could only do that to several thousand liberal types inhabiting the Washington DC area! The sun would shine.... birds would sing.... and America would be a vastly better place. :-)
Time to go into the living room and wake up my sweetie to see if she'd prefer sleeping in bed over sleeping on the sofa. I'm betting that bed (and the snuggles that go with it) will win out. :-)
Living in Dallas was never something I enjoyed in my core. Sure it's nice to be able to run out at 3AM and find a place open to get something to eat.... but that's not the essence of life. Life is for *living* and enjoying. Becky and I (mostly me for the last two years) worked hard to build our retirement home. During that time frame.... and actually the 4 years prior..... I can't recall a time when I didn't have half a dozen projects going at once and Becky busy planning something else to add to my list.
Eventually her last two months and my previous 6 years simply wiped me out. Clinical fatigue left me so physically worn down that just walking from my car into the store where I worked required me to sit down and rest. All my muscles burned as though I had been a the gym pumping iron to failure. I was forced to take a leave of absence from work to rest and recover.
Within the first week without Becky I realized that I simply could not stay in that house without her. It was OUR house... not mine. Since my world had been turned upside-down when she died I decided that as long as I was going through a huge life change anyway..... just floorboard it and get all the life changes over with at once.
As it happens on rare occasions...... God touches your life and things you had only dreamed of for decades suddenly become tangible. My best friend, whom I had known since she was 16 (now 54), also had a life changing event when her husband departed. Since we had always loved each other from afar we decided to get together and see if there was still magic when we were together. To boil all that down into a really short story...... there was and we are. :-)
Of course she and I becoming an US also meant that I had to get my butt busy and start getting the house in Dallas emptied out and things moved up to Wichita Falls. I bought a cargo trailer to make things easier since I had my Isuzu Trooper which could tow it. Sorta. Turns out that the Trooper was just not up to that task so I had to make some *more* changes. Sold the Trooper the next day to a co-worker who really needed it...... then traded Becky's KIA in on a 2002 Ford Excursion with a 7.3 liter diesel engine. I got a good deal in that I only paid $6500 for the truck and blue-book value was just shy of $13K.
However...... two high pressure oil lines had to be replaced. Made the mistake of taking it to the local Ford dealer where I shelled out $1600. I found out later that a local diesel mechanic would have done it for less than $200. Lesson learned.
The big diesel tows the loaded trailer as if it were not even hooked up. Set the cruise control at whatever speed you legally desire and just sit back and enjoy the ride... your butt cradled in leather and the XM radio filling the interior with Bach and Mendelssohn. (Yeah... life is rough)
Several trips back and forth later I arrived in Dallas for another load after having smelled diesel fuel the entire trip. Parked the truck and popped the hood to discover diesel fuel covering the entire passengers side of the engine compartment. The radiator overflow tank was totally full of diesel fuel!! As you might suspect.... that's NOT where it belongs. A quick check on the Internet showed that the injector sleeves were the problem.
Another Internet check showed that dealers charged $3500 per bank to replace the sleeves so double that and we hit $7000 real fast. Remember I only paid $6500 for the truck. Next factor in fact that all the rubber hoses which had come in contact with the diesel fuel would have to be replaced. Otherwise they would soften and potentially fail at the worst possible time. Next drain and flush and refill the cooling system and we're well past $10K at a dealership.
Thus I, once again, hit the Internet and bought the entire sleeve replacement kit.... including the removal and installation tools for a whopping $344. Next I did some shopping around and found a certified shop with a good reputation and got an estimate. Liking what I had heard I delivered the vehicle that afternoon so they could get started. The parts arrived the next morning so my little rental car and I made a quick trip to the shop for the parts delivery.
A rocket trip to Dallas to check on the remaining pets and bring a few odds and ends back then wait for the phone call letting me know that my truck was ready. That call came in early Friday morning so I blasted over to Enterprise to both turn in the rental and to get a ride to the shop. The bill at the non-Ford repair shop was right at $2500 including tax so I was a happy camper. My first round trip to Dallas and back.... driving unloaded down and pulling a trailer full of stationary power tools back indicated an average increase of nearly 4 MPG. With diesel near or over $4 a gallon.... that is significant!
While this transitional period is somewhat stressful we're all gradually making the adaptation towards being a family. The biggest single problem is an obvious one. A person cannot move from one place into another without there being a time frame where things are a bit cluttered. She isn't someone who tolerates clutter well so this period is particularly stressful for her. On the other hand she is happier than she has been in years so there is something of a balance here. I'm still debating the subject of work and not really sure if the Wal-Mart relationship is going to continue or not. Once the house in Dallas sells I honestly have less than $1000 in financial obligations (truck payment for 2 years...... insurance..... investments and phone) and a bit over $2500 a month in income. Donate the excess to my honey up here to help out with expenses and it's all good.
Now that things are settling into a state closer to "normal" once again I plan to be posting on a more regular basis. I have missed this outlet and the opportunity it gives me to both communicate life events here..... and nail the lefts ass to the freaking wall on my more politically orientated blog. (MoveonDOTblog) Oh... in that paragraph just above this one.... exactly at the word "cluttered" the HP wireless keyboard I had been using can to the end of it's usefulness and was broken across my knee and deposited in the nearest trash container. It's performance was.... shall we say..... less than expected or required. Damn..... now if I could only do that to several thousand liberal types inhabiting the Washington DC area! The sun would shine.... birds would sing.... and America would be a vastly better place. :-)
Time to go into the living room and wake up my sweetie to see if she'd prefer sleeping in bed over sleeping on the sofa. I'm betting that bed (and the snuggles that go with it) will win out. :-)
posted by Rev. Joe Ruyle | 7:59 PM
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